STM Meeting

This is what we do during our meetings... yeah.

A Family Once Unknown

It's amazing how one common goal can unite strangers.

When I first got together with my STM (Short Term's Mission) team, I considered them all strangers. Sure, we had grown up in the same church for years, but I rarely communicated with them. I was always in my own group, and they in theirs. So you can guess that when we got together for the first time to meet, I felt relatively shy amongst them.

Anyways, for the past few months, we've been meeting and sharing our spiritual growth, preparing the lessons, and organizing various fundraisers. Even though we had been meeting together for quite some time now, I still felt relatively uncomfortable around them.

That all changed last Sunday.

On Sunday, we held our fundraising dinner at Burnaby Alliance Church. We had been preparing for weeks, organizing guests, food, games, decor, and other important aspects. However, no one could expect just how much effort and time was needed until that actual day.

The day was extremely long. In just a few short hours, we had to put together an evening for over 100 people. It was crazy! We rushed to get organized by preparing the tables, the lighting, the games, the presentations, the organized help... etc. It was a tiring experience.

However, the one thing that amazed me was how quickly we banded together. Everybody worked together to get things done. Nobody argued or had anything negative to say. It was amazing how smoothly it went.

What's more, we became family.

Our team had never done anything together like this since we've started meeting. Putting together an evening dinner in such a short amount of time made us become one. We were united in our goal. We shared in laughter, in struggle, and in pleasure the entire night. We had, at times, some downs, yet though all the toils and troubles, and in my moments of stress, many of my team members unknowingly did something to help me feel better. A smile, a pat on the back, a shared joke, a word of encouragement; these are things that strangers don't usually do for each other.

For some reason after the dinner, I finally felt like these people, who had once been strangers to me, were my family. I began to see various individuals, not as "that person", but as someone who understands me and has the same goals as I. All the uncomfortable feelings were gone. They were my brothers and sisters in Christ. Our blood, tears, and sweat had been spilled.

Altogether, this summer has been extremely stressful, with my last semester of university, working 3-4 days a week, and on top of all that, the mission's trip itself. All that being said, I have come to realize one thing this week: not only do I have Christ as my rock, I have this team as well.

I am so happy to be working with this group of individuals. I couldn't ask for anybody better. They are, without a doubt, a family once unknown.

Happiness in the Dark

The other day I was having a conversation with a friend who had recently left my church. He said to me, "The church (Burnaby Alliance) is falling apart".

I thought he was right.

Recently, Burnaby Alliance (BAC) had been going through many changes. We got news that our youth pastor was leaving, and several long time members of our church had already done so weeks before. They were (and still are) all good friends of mine, so it was tough to see them go. It felt like a piece of me and the church was leaving.

I must admit, with the departure of these people, things had begun to feel hopeless, pointless, and despairing. For a while, I, like many people in the church, felt a sense of disbelief and sadness. Why would God bring such troubles to our doorstep?

For the past few weeks, I was feeling quite down the last little while because of all that had happened.

Until today.

We had a baptism this morning, and as I sat there watching all the young teens and children giving their testimonies, I realized something: God has not left us. My friend was wrong.

Indeed, we had and will continue to lose many important people in our church, but God continues to bring in new individuals and strong young leaders to take over. Moreover, even though we were going through hardships (and still are), God has not stopped working in our church and making changes for His glory. Finally, these troubles are when our faith is tested, and not only can and will this bring us as a church family together, it can, in the end, better us as a whole because of it. It is when a family is put to the test must they band together to find strength and comfort in each other.

Ultimately, prior to today I felt like BAC was in the darkness, as was I. However I realized that despite being in the darkness, so too can I find happiness and optimism, and it is only when I fix my eyes upon Christ do I see it.

So I'll Wait...

Hungry i come to You
For i know You satisfy
I am weary but i know Your touch
Restores my life

So i'll wait for You
So i'll wait for You

I'm falling on knees
Offering all of me
Jesus You're all this heart is waiting for

Broken i run to You
For Your arms are opened wide
I am empty but i know Your love
Does not run dry

So i'll wait for You
So i'll wait for You

I'm falling on knees
Offering all of me
Jesus You're all this heart is waiting for

Broken in Millions

Today im feeling broken
Lost and scared defined
With missing pieces hoping
Tomorrow I will find
All that I am seeking yearning to behold
Hanging on with all I am

Each step I take I’m losing
Just a little more of me
Darkness falls surrounding
Im blinded I won’t see
Must be something better must be something more
My heart my soul is crying

Time goes on seasons change
Through it all we're given

One million pieces of light
One million slivers of white
Sparkling all for you, falling all for you
One million rays of sunshine
One million colors so fine
Shining all for you, revealed all for you
Created just for you, created just for you

Ive waited here so long now
Forgotten what it means
To feel, to trust to know how
Mend cuts and hurts between
crying to be wanted aching to be grasped
longing for with all I have

Cant know what will shape through
Nor the number of my days
So here on in I’ll trust you
to show and guide my way
Finding faith in small things learning that in truth
All this beauty made for me

Time goes on seasons change
Through it all we're given

One million pieces of light
One million slivers of white
Sparkling all for you, falling all for youOne million rays of sunshine
One million colors so fineShining all for you, revealed all for you
Created just for you, created just for you

Created just for you, created just for you

The Persuit of the Proper Road

The one thing I've learned is that if God doesn't want you to do something, he won't let it happen. Plain and simple. That being said, this isn't necessarily a bad thing.

Around the fall of last year, I heard about this opportunity from a friend in the church in which I could go over to Malaysia (Kuala Lampur) to teach ESL with a Christian company. I was so excited! This was my opportunity for me to go out and get some good teaching experience. What's more, it was in a foreign country in which I've been before, it's where my roots are, it was with a Christian group, and best of all, it didn't require me to be a University graduate to apply with the company. It felt like this was God's plan for me. It truly got my hopes up.

In the weeks after, I started e-mailing the head of the school. I sent her my resume, stories and information about myself. With that, I waited for a few months, but to my surprise, got no response in the following weeks. After wondering why I had not received any word from the head of the school, I turned to my friend, who knew the head personally, and she was nice enough to find out what was going on. After a few months of waiting again, I finally got an e-mail in which I was told I could come, and that they were finding accommodations for me. At this point, my hope was rekindled. I finally felt like God was moving this path along for me.

I waited a few more months for the next response so that I could hammer out the details with the company, but like my situation in the previous months, I got no replying e-mail back. I sent numerous messages to them, yet got nothing in return. I was so frustrated. I felt like God was taking away this awesome opportunity for me. I was really bitter about it because it meant so much to me. I had planned to go there during the summer, and now my plans appeared to be ruined. I finally gave up and decided to move on. I was so angry with God. Why would He do this to me? Why would He give me that hope and then, in just a few months time, crush my aspirations?

Things felt hopeless.

But only for a little while.

Only a few months later, early on in the spring of this year, I heard about an opportunity to go on a missions trip to Mexico to teach ESL for a week with my church. I jumped at the opportunity, and am now fully engaged and am preparing for this wonderful trip. It's a humbling experience to know that God has brought me to where I am right now. I have learned so much already, both spiritually and mentally, about myself in these recent weeks of preparation for the trip. It has truly been a beneficial experience for me thus far, and I haven't even gone on the trip yet. I can't say that I would have learned this much about myself and my spiritual life if I had gone on that trip to Malaysia, so for that, I am thankful.

Ultimately, God took away my trip to Malaysia because he had something better planned for my life. God wanted me to go to Mexico to serve Him rather than to Malaysia to serve myself.

God really has a plan for us, and in the end, it always works out. At first, things don't always seem that way, but if we give it time and let God take control of our lives, the better road will appear to us, and it is that road that God prompts us to walk along.

I bet he's looking down on me, smiling, and saying, "I told you so Chris". How can I blame him? I know he's right.